sopettyandtiny:

So, there’s a thing about the community of roleplay (as far as I’m concerned, I know of only tumblr RP, but I think this can crossover to any forms of playing games with others); and it’s the issue of players unable to say ‘no’.

The thing is, you don’t need a reason. If you feel like the other person will not add to want you want to do, say no. If you even like their character concept, but don’t feel like starting new threads, say no. If you already follow the same character and you don’t want to talk to more than one, say no. You don’t care for a plot idea, say no. Even your mutual followers you’ve played with before, and you simply aren’t feeling it at the moment, just say no.

The initial fear is that you don’t want to hurt their feelings, but what people don’t realize is that they’re sacrificing what they want for others. There is no need to make a hobby pressuring and stressful. You do not need to sacrifice your time and happiness for anyone else. Ever, in anything in life, to be honest. Don’t put up with things if they are detrimental. 

In truth, the other player is going to move just as quickly as you’ve denied interaction. And it’s nothing to lose sleep on. Most players are students and hold jobs; you have bigger things to think about than worrying about a saying ‘no’ to a stranger you’ve never, and maybe will never, meet.

And if you ever get abuse to follow and to RP with someone, you need to give them the most FOR SURE no you’ve ever given. To guilt and pressure someone into doing anything they don’t want to do for a hobby is wrong. In fact, in my experience, you run from those types. Hell, it might seem tough, but are they really going to make your life better now they’re got you wrapped you around their finger? Hell no. More than likely, they’re going to make your experience complete shit and it’s not worth the stress and effort. In this community, you don’t owe anyone anything.

If you don’t know about how to go say ‘no’, the easiest way is just saying, “Thank you for asking. I’m very flattered but at this time, I’m not really interested. I appreciate you asking though!” I’ve never gotten backlash from being nice. And you’re not being rude by looking out for yourself. That’s the thing people need to wrap their heads around: You. Are. Not. Being. Rude.  

Just remember it also takes courage to ask someone to play along. There’s a lot of anxiety when it comes to asking for interaction, so giving a soft, gentle answer is always the best way to go. Don’t be an asshole when answering, you’ll never get ANYONE to play with you. No matter how popular you are, we’ve all been denied before. Positive actions can give positive reactions, even in a negative situation. No need to burn bridges and ruin your reputation. But the example I gave is literally the most perfect answer. Copy and paste it, for all I care if it makes it easier to look out for yourself, do it.

TL;DR:

• Don’t need reason to to say no.
• Be polite when declining.
• Don’t take abuse.
• Carry on.

It’s a big community, you aren’t the first, you will not be the last, and you will get it yourself. In the end, no matter why you RP, it’s an outlet for creativity. Play how you want to play, with who you want to play with.